It's often said that time is life. But many people aren't enjoying the time of their lives because they have too much to do and too little time and they're feeling tremendous pressure and stress because of it. Perhaps you're one of these people.
In order to relax, you may have tried meditation, hypnosis, exercise, tai chi, relaxing music, bubble baths and, maybe a time or two, alcohol.
Consider the possibility that it's not what you do that's causing you to feel anxious and stressed but, rather, what you think.
So what follows are some changes you can make in the way you think about time that will allow you to overcome the time pressures you're feeling:
1. Stop saying, "I haven't got the time."
When you keep repeating, "I haven't got the time," you create a world in which you find yourself constantly running to catch up. Replace "I haven't got the time" with "I have plenty of time to do what's important."
Consider the possibility that "I don't have enough time" really means, "It's not important enough." That which is not important may never be completed and, perhaps, it shouldn't be. It's all a matter of priorities.
I was sharing this idea with a woman who kept resisting what I was saying. I asked if she had children and found out she had two, a boy of 7 and a girl who was 12.
"Okay," I said. "Imagine it's a busy day at work. In fact, you've never been so busy. Your phone rings. It's the nurse at your son's school. He has been injured during recess and rushed to a hospital. You need to get there immediately."
"Of course," I said to this woman. "You apologize to the nurse and say that you won't be coming to the hospital because you're just too busy. You haven't got the time."
She looked at me like I was crazy. She would, of course, have put aside everything and rushed to be with her son no matter how busy she was. Why? Because there's no such thing as not enough time. There are simply some things that are more important than others.
2. Stop saying, "I procrastinate."
When you keep describing yourself as a procrastinator, you turn a choice into a problem. Replace "I procrastinate" with "I'm choosing to do this later (or never)."
I was a business coach for a person who thought of himself as lazy because he always did things at the last minute. I asked how long he had been this way. He said, "My entire life."
I said, "You don't procrastinate. You simply do things at the last minute. Stop calling it procrastination and start calling it what it is: Waiting to do something until the last minute. When you call it procrastination you turn it into a problem. It's not."
Notice your way of approaching tasks. Not the way you think you'd like to approach tasks, but the way you actually do. Consider the possibility that this is the way you choose to do things and it works for you. Stop turning a personal choice into a problem.
3. Stop saying "I'm overwhelmed."
When you keep repeating, "I'm overwhelmed," you create a life of pressure and stress. Replace the emotionally charged, "I'm overwhelmed" with "I have a lot to do."
There is a major difference between having many items on your to do list and being overwhelmed by having many items on your to do list. Having many items on your to do list is a fact. Being overwhelmed by having many items on your to do list is a psychological fantasy that you've created.
Some people don't want to give up this fantasy because they believe they work better under pressure. Great. Those people should continue to pressure themselves. But they should stop complaining that the pressure has any relationship to how much they have to do.
